I remember when I first got pregnant with David, I feared that I would never, ever loose the baby weight and I would never have an interest in fashion or makeup or… anything… ever again. Our culture seems to expect a mom to loose herself in her children, and if she doesn’t, she isn’t a very good mom.
I’m sorry to burst that bubble, that’s total crap.
That’s not good for a woman, that’s not good for a family and a marriage or relationship, and that’s not good for a child (for a lot of reasons!)
You have to embrace AND. I can be a mom AND enjoy getting dressed. I can be a good mom AND need time away from my children to recharge. I can like expensive things AND like a bargain. Why does one thing have to exclude another? This all or nothing sentiment isn’t healthy. Life isn’t black or white- there’s so much grey. Love that grey area. You’ll be happier, from my experience.
This leads me back to my original sentence- as a soon to be mother, I belived I wouldn’t really have an interest in fashion again. I realized this was complete bollocks at about two weeks postpartum, as I stared eagerly at my pre-baby clothes. I couldn’t wait to reclaim that part of myself, in the midst of a sleep deprived fog.
Almost three years of motherhood later, and I still like getting dressed up. I certainly think differently about the clothes that I buy (can this be washed if my Caroline spits up on it? is a major concern), but that hasn’t stopped me from having fun with clothes.
My momiform this week balanced cold rainy weather, an evaluation meeting, and a grumpy toddler. (Any one else find that their toddler was particularly irritable this week? Full moon, maybe?) My husband kindly snapped some highlights this week.
I’ve fully embraced AND. I can be a mom AND still follow my love for good clothing. You gotta do you, friend.
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